Kunal Chopra's diary - 29 March 2012 - Ansu jo aankhon mein kahi ruk gaye the

Kunal's diary- Papa main pass ho gaya

It was another aha moment for papa and beta after Kunal started working. Papa is proud of his son and the son probably happy that finally he has done something good which made his papa smile.

Main hamesha kehta aaya hoon ki anand aur ma se main sabse jyada kareeb hoon/tha
Aur un dono ke baad mein akela reh gaya hoon
Magar pata hi nahi chala, kab papa ne maa ki jagah le li
Woh chahe mere shabdon ko kabhi samajh na paye ho
Magar mera man jaroor padh lete hai
Woh mera chehra kabhi padh na paye ho
Magar meri bhawnaon ko jaroor samajh lete hai
Woh jante hai kab mujhe sahare ki jaroorat hoti hai
Aur kab kisi ki salah ki

cd ya Siddhi
Jaise kal kaha tha, is mein ko do raay nahi hai, CD ki kimat sirf utni hi hai ki
Siddhi ki zindagi bach sakti hai, CD dene se

Aansu jo aankhon se beh jaye anmol hote hai
un aansuon ka kya, jo aankhon mein kahi tham jaye
Rishte jo zindagi bhar saath nibhaye anmol hote hai
un rishton ka kya jo kabhi jud to nahi pate, magar tut bhi nahi pate
Ehsaas jo labon par aa jaye anmol hote hai
un ehsaason ka kya jo labon par aakar hi tham jaye
Subah jo nayee roshni laye, zindagi jeene ka sahara hoti hai
un subah ka kya jo andhere se ladte ladte thak jati hai
Phool jo khusbho bikhare, anmol hote hai
un phoolon ka kya jo khilne se pehle hi murjha jate hai

PS: There are a lot of things worth writing about today's episode, probably a part II some other time..calling it a day. And Kunal too already said a lot of things in the episode today about the joy of victory being incomplete if the reason for joy is not there- can repeat them but probably not.

I sometimes wonder how sometimes a ten second scene (blushing scene) or a ten minute scene (Raj/Kunal's conversation on 29th March) make the entire twenty minutes bearable that I don't mind or see anything else.

Kunal Chopra's diary- 28th March 2012-Kuch Saaman aur Kuch Yaadein Nishani hai

Kunal Chopra's diary- 28th March, 2012- Insaan ke pass na hone par, cheezein hi nishani ban kar reh jati hai

Aise to insaan ke aage saaman ki kya ahemiyat
Insaan hai to cheezein aur bhi aa jayengi
Magar jab wahi insaan pass nahi hota hai to uski har cheez kitni ahem ho jati hai
Un cheezon se judi yaadein un mamooli cheezon ko keemti bana deti hai
Shayad insaan in cheezon ke jariye khud ko beete kal se jode rakhne ki koshish karta hai
Yaadein fir bhi dhoondli pad sakti hai, magar cheezein shayad hame ateet se jode rakhti hai

Siddhi mere pass hai, kimat hai woh CD jisme tumhari begunahi ka saboot hai
Faisla tumhe karna hai

Isme sochne ki ya chunne ki koi gunjaish hi nahi thi
Ek pal nahi laga mujhe yeh faisla lene mein ki kis ki jyada ahemiyat hai
Meri rihaai ya uski zindagi
Court mein case shayad kisi aur tarah se bhi jeeta ja sakta hai
Magar Siddhi ki zindagi bachane ka shayad ab aur koi raasta baki nahi tha
Kya waqai faisla mere haath mein tha
Kya waqai CD lautane se Siddhi sahi salamat wapis aa jayegi
Jaise jaise samay beet raha tha, uske wapis aane ki aas kam hoti jaa rahe thi
Aur utni hi meri lachari bhi bhad rahi thi
Aaj uske itna kareeb hone ke bawjood niraasha hi haath lagi thi
Shayad mere ek aur rishte ka imtihaan hai
Dekhna hai, rishta bachta hai ya main use bhi kho dunga auron ki tarah

Kapil ne kahan ki meri galatiyon ki saza Siddhi bhugat rahee hai
Saari galtiyan aap kare aur saza Siddhi ko mile
Waise yeh sahi to nahi hai, ki meri galtiyon ki saza use mile
Magar shayad use saza hi isliye mil rahe thi ki woh ab mujhse jud chuki thi
Kya yeh meri galti hai ki Richa se kabhi mera rishta tha
Hum apne har rishte ko nahi chunte hai, kuch rishte hume chunte hai
Kya maine kum keemat chukayi hai Richa se rishta rakhne ki
Ab jab Siddhi mujhse jud gayee hai to meri har jane anjane mein ki galatiyon ki keemat use bhi ada karni pad rahe thi  

Lekin shayad yeh sab Kapil nahi, Siddhi ka bada bhai bol raha tha
uski pareshani bol rahe thi,
Woh mujhpar ilzaam par ilzaam laga raha tha magar ek dayare mein reh kar,
Baar baar, woh mujhe aap, Kunal ji keh raha tha
Rishton ki ahemiyat bhule nahi the

-Thats all for today..lets see when the kidnapping saga ends ....

Kunal Chopra's diary- 27 March 2012 - Kya subah ke sapne sach hote hai

Kunal's diary - Hamare khwabon ko churakar inhe muskurata hua dekhe

Hum logon ki kadar tab karte hai jab woh hamari zindagi se door chale jate hai
Yeh baat maine ab jake sikhi -
I think this is more a repeat of Friday's episode (23rd March), where I had written the analogy of saansein.

Tujhe paa kar kho hi diya tha
Ab kho kar fir paya hai to fir khona nahi hai

Ab jab yeh ehsaas ho gaya hai ki Siddhi meri zindagi mein kya mayane rakhti hai, to aage chal kar yahi koshish rahegi ki woh meri zindagi se alag na ho.

Shuru mein to laga tha, ki Siddhi jald hi mil jayegi
Magar ab waqt bittata jaa raha hai
Aur dheere dheere man kamzor padta jaa raha hai
Aisa hi lag raha tha jaise koi apna hospital mein bharti ho aur aap siway use santwana dene ke kuch nahi kar sakte (hasptal= hindi sounds too wierd, so the switch to hospital)
Kehne ke liye to insaan sab kuch kar sakte hai, magar shayad kabhi kabhi uske haath mein kuch hota hi nahi hai
Aur jab insaan majboor ho jata hai to use kuch khone ka dar satane lagta hai
Kabhi apne sapno ke bikharne ka dar
to kabhi kisi apne se door jane ka dar
aur kabhi akele reh jane ka dar
Rishtey insaan ko kahi na kahi kamzor bana hi dete hai
Aur haalat bebas
Jaise, koi aapko madad ke liye pukar raha ho, magar aapke haath bandhe ho
Aaj utna hi bebas paye hai apne aap ko

(I can't thank my family enough for being there with me- especially my dad, he cant understand me completely, but I know he will always be there for me, sometimes as a listener, sometimes as a guide)

Yeh raat kafi lambi lag rahe thi, jaise iski subah hi nahi hogi
Agar pehle se pata hota ki itne ache khwab se subah shuru hogi to shayad jald hi so jata

aahista aahista koi hume inka hota hua dekha
aur hamari neendein udakar inhe chain se sota hua dekhe

aahista aahista koi hume inke rang mein dhalta hua dekhe
aur hamare khwabon ko churakar inhe muskurata hua dekhe

Jab se Siddhi ko shayari kehte suna tha, man mein ek khwahish thi, ki woh mujhse aise hi shayarana andaz mein baat kare
Apne man ki baat to har koi kehta hai, aur waise dekha jaye to shabd to shabd hi hai
Magar ek shayar ka andaaze bayan kuch aur hi hota hai
Ek hi lafz ke kai mayane hote hai
Kai baar baat kuch nahi hoti aur kai baar kuch na keh kar bhi sab kuch bayan kar dete hai

Aahista aahista jaise dabe paon bina ke kisi ke jaane,
kisi ne man mein ghar kar liya tha aur aankhon mein naye khwab saja diye the
aur jin aankhon mein khwab ho unmein neend kaha !

Bachpan mein suna tha, ki subah subah ke dekhe sapne sach hote hai
Shayad mera sapna bhi sach ho jaye
Aur koi bahut bada khwab bhi to nahi dekha tha
Ek mamooli se insaan ka ek aam sa khwab tha
Khushi ke kuch lamhe
Kisi ki muskaan se subah ki shuruaat

PS: Did I say, I just loved the jor ka jhatka that Rohit got, yeh to sirf peshgi (Advance jhapad) tha aage aage dekhiye kya hoga !!! 

Kunal Chopra's diary- 26 March 2012- Should I write or pass

I really and truly felt cheated today, it is almost next to impossible to write something decent today. It is truly a case of damned if you do and damned if you don't.
If I write, just for the sake of writing, it is just like filling pages, and if I don't write it's just no good. But thankfully, its been past the 30 days of writing,. so technically I don't have to write a diary today, neverthless good or bad here it is.

It was time to eat and the goondas offered Siddhi food. And she threw the plate back at them. I wouldn't like to analyse Siddhi's worrying about Kunal, but if we talk about food.

Aadat
Aadat hai meri, main to aise hi hoon, yeh mera style hai
Aadat ek aisa shabd hai jiski aad mein insaan apni majboori apni kamjori sab chipa leta hai
Kai baatein jo shuru mein ajeeb lagti hai, dheere dheere ek aadat ban jati hai
Jaise roz subah uththe hi akhbar padna
Uthtthe hi friend ko phone karna
Nashte mein corn flakes
Train mein phone par gane sunna
Tv dekhte samay remote hamesha haath mein rakhna
Cricket dekhte waqt, players ko suggestions dena
Khane mein jo bhi bana ho uski burai karna..fir chahe woh kitna hi acha kyon na ho.
Adat hai meri
Jaise Kunal kehte hai, yeh mera style hai.

So Siddhi was also acting today by her aadat only, she has gotten used to eating together with Kunal, so her wondering did he eat was normal, even though she was kidnapped, at dinner time, if you think about your family there is nothing unsual in it, more so when you have dinner together.

Also, I think it is more of a female instinct or nature, to always ask, khana khaya, nashta kiya, khane mein kya khaya, etc. A man wouldn't do that normallly, and that is her way to show that she cares.

And probably, the thoughts of her akdu husband were giving her some moral support as well, because somewhere she was feeling that she isn't alone in this, and somewhere he must not only be worried about her but would be looking out for her as well. And his thoughts brought a faint smile on her face even in such adverse situations.

That's all I can write today !!! Unfortunately !

This is one serial where I can I say, I really enjoyed watching the scenes of Mr T the big villain in the serial. He was really shown scared of Mr Chopra or rather Mrs and Mr Chopra.
Truly, Siddhi is a fitting biwi to the Chopra Husband !
Not once has she been shown the timid kinds but is shown as someone who is willing to face them and surprisingly here also her bhashans don't stop. She is truly a lawyer who as they say, make money out of talking only and she can really scream !

And as for Kunal, I think it wouldn't be correct for me to write anything, because I would be guessing his thoughts. He was almost absent from the screen today, all that happened was Mr Chopra finally got out of thinking mode, he had done enough of thinking and rationalising and planning and was now time for action. But he is still not the irrational, act first and think later person, he is not yet willing to take the law in his hands. As it has been only few hours since his wife is kidnapped, he hasn't been shown to be worried about her safety just yet.

Kunal Chopra's diary -23 March 2012- I love you to want me

This is Kunal's diary for 23/March-I want you for myself and not for my family

Aaj kamre mein ek ajeeb si khamoshi thi

Waise to Siddhi us kamre mein nahi thi

Magar shayad woh har jagah maujud thi

Jaise, har kone mein koi ek yaad basi thi

Waise to jab jab woh tokti thi to chid bhi utthit thi

Magar aaj lag raha tha, koi to mujhe tok de

Kaise woh har samay mere aage piche ghoomti rehti thi

Waise to har baar main use santwana deta tha uske aanso pochta tha

Magar aaj lag raha tha, woh aakar keh de ki sab thik ho jayega

Waise to zindagi jaise taise kat hi rahi thi

Magar aaj lag raha tha ki zindagi mein kuch to kami hai

Waise to kisi ke bina zindagi rukti nahi hai

Magar aaj jaise kuch kho gaya tha

It was a long and eventful /unending day for Kunal, starting with the holi celebration to hearing about Siddhi's potential kidnap. 

The yester year's Kunal would have raged like a mad person at T and Co, but he probably realised that this would not only harm his case but also put Siddhi in danger. So he did something which he generally doesn't do, he thought before taking action. He rationalised everything and took the police with him. 

He probably knows that T has only kidnapped her so it gives him an additional comfort that T cannot kill her, after all he is a respectable person and will not do such a grave crime as a murder. Further Kunal has been in the profession of law for close to a decade, so he knows the ways of the world and knows that these things do happen (I know kidnap of a third person and kidnap of Siddhi cant be compared, but he has probably seen this so it is not a big surprise for him, and he kind of knows that T will not physically harm her). And Kunal is not the one to worry about someone's food and water etc, I am sure he will not eat and all this will happen gradually.

Kunal is shown to be a reserved person, who doesn't open up to people, infact he is shown a man of few words in key things, he is short tempered and can express anger but not other emotions. It is his diary that he really opens up to, he doesn't tell anything to his father also, but that trickle of the tear was enough to show how worried he was. And the slump, he just slumped on the bed, it showed his frustration and helplessness.

Further, Kunal already knows that he likes Siddhi a lot and cares for her, but today they showed that he wants her in his life just as much. I just feel sad that he doesn't have a good recollection of the holi confession, it is an important moment of his life, which sadly at this point he doesn't remember. 

I think the like/lv has various shades, he has feelings for her, but today they showed that he wants her to be in his life and he has accepted it and acknowledged it and probably is willing to fight for her and not give up on her. 

I can remember the english song,

[I'd love you to want me the way that I want you

the way that it should be]

I think it is a good feeling to be wanted !!!

I am not justifying his actions, but putting across my views. Thanks to Annie and other IF forum members, I may have presented your views in other words, hope it is not a complete copy !!! Thanks for reading

Kunal Chopra's diary - 23 March 2012 - Siddhi Kidnapped

Kunal's diary will be posted in the second round, but here are some lines from Siddhi-

kya woh mujhe yaad kar rahe honge

How so very simply put by Siddhi, no hi-fi words, no jargons, no sugar coated words.
Very simple words,
would he be missing me?
would he be remembering me?
Would he have noticed my absence?
Isn't it a very natural feeling or emotion that a lot of us have.
We all want to be loved by our family, we want them to care for us, shower their affection on us and when they are not there we want them to miss us.
Is it our ego or self importance or is it our helplessness

The previous day, the husband and wife have a small argument and they end up fighting and not talking to each other.
Next day morning, its a Monday morning and the husband has to go for work..the normal routine as most of us would be aware of is, the wife is generally running around the husband to ensure that he leaves for office on time.
[Arre, meri chai lana
Aaj ka akhbar kaha hai
Meri shirt iron nahi hai..ab kya pehnonga office ke liye
And Kunal's dialogue, meri files, mere important documents, mera phone, meri medicines kahan hai
]
Every day, when the husband keeps calling for the wife, the wife would complaint and crib
ek kaam bhi apne aap nahi kar sakte
main kya kya karoon
ek tang par khade reh kar saara kaam karna padta hai and a lot more dialogues can be said on similar lines..

But now, the husband wife have had a fight, so neither the husband can call the wife, nor the wife will do the running
The house is very quite, nevertheless the husband starts getting ready
Wife keeps looking towards the husband hoping that now he will call her name, now he will call her.
But he never does, he meticulously gets ready for work
He manages to get ready on time and is about to leave when the wife stops him and she starts arguing with him over some inane thing and after lot of circling around
she asks him that today why didn't you call me even once while getting ready [I know I could have explained this in a better way, but this kinda scene is not my forte]

It is a case of damned if you do, damned if you don't do- bulaye to musibat hai, na bulaye to musibat hai
When the husband or even wife for that matter, is looking up to the other person for
doing some chores or anything, it is not because he/she can't do the task themselves, but it is more out of a feeling of security/interdependency
The feeling of give/take- helping/asking for help is very much mutual

Finally some analogy/comparison
hum din mein kitni baar saans lete hai chodte hai
kya kabhi tumne gini hai
jab tak yeh saanse chalti rehti hai, hum unhe mahsoos bhi nahi karte hai
magar ek pal ke liye bhi agar saanse atak jaye to zindagi tham se jati hai
insaan ki yahi fitrat hai shayad, jab koi nahi hota hai, tabhi uski ehmiyat ka ehsaas hota hai

Kunal Chopra's diary - 22nd March 2012 -Uff yeh ada

I am laughing at myself for the title I have given..but well well, this is Pooja and not Kunal who is starting the diary..I hope it brought a smile on everyone else's face too.. :)

Uff yeh ada
uff yeh nazakat
uff yeh sharmana
uff yeh halke se maathe par haath ferna, sochna ke yeh khwab hai ya haqeeqat
kya yeh main hi hoon ya koi aur
uff yeh nazre jhukana
uff yeh dheere dheere se tera muskurana
uff yun kisi ko yaad karna
kunal chopra jaise akru ke hoton par yeh halki se muskurahat

(enough of my uff..magar woh 10 second the bade hi kamal ke)

Now the other key highlight or mini highlight for today's episode ..
Siddhi ki aarti poori ho gayee ho to main chai pee loon.
Seema jab Siddhi ki taareef kar rahee thi, to shayad main man hi man soch raha tha
Siddhi ko mujhse behtar kaun jaanta hai
Tum mujhe baata rahee ho ki Siddhi kitni achi hai
Mujhe, mujhse behtar yeh kaun jaan sakta hai
Haan tum logon ne mera Siddhi par gussa dekha hai
Mera usse jhagdna dekha hai
Uspar hukum chalana dekha hai
Magar, mera ....nahi dekha hai
Ab to Siddhi aage aage hai, aur Kunal peeche peeche
Aaj se pehle jab bhi Seema Siddhi ki waqalat karti ti thi, to man mein guilt (I am using the english word, because the hindi word is too filmy or heavy weighted word) rehta tha
Kabhi apne behaviour par bura lagta to kabhi Siddhi ka dard dekho dukh hota tha
Magar aaj, aaj na to guilt hai aur na hi koi dukh
Aur iski wajah yeh hai ki main yeh jaanta bhi hoon aur maanta bhi hoon ki Siddhi is tareef ki haqdaar hai

And the main dhamaka of today was my wife's kidnapping, I would not like to comment on the kidnapping, because I am myself not completely convinced of all actions of Kunal post kidnapping so will stop blabbering further.

Honestly even I couldnt decipher Kunal's behaviour post his knowledge that Siddhi has gotten kidnapped so will wait until friday, when we get to see the husband reacting on his wife's kidnapping by his jani dushman

Kunal Chopra's diary - 21st March 2012 marz bhi wahi hai dawa bhi

Ek toofan ke guzarne ke baad jo khamoshi hoti hai, shayad aaj wahi thi khamoshi thi.

My thoughts may be or rather are all random, because that was the state of my mind today.

Sometimes I think, it is my birth right to argue with my wife on every topic in the world.
When I had commented, that you can argue about anything from food to the mattress, little did I realise, that my wife was competing with no one less than Mr Chopra himself who has the copyright to argue and then win any argument under the sun.
So even if it is as lame a thing as a pain killer, I have to argue with my wife.
You can give us any topic on this earth, and we can show you how to argue for or against it.
But then I wonder, why do I even argue with her, the results of the debate are a foregone conclusion, we both know who is going to win.
I either put my arms down seeing her watery eyes or sometimes I give up just when she starts blushing.
But then can I claim to be a husband if I don't argue with my wife?
I sometimes argue, just to see her win and sometimes just so.
If only she knew that I enjoy losing as much as she enjoys winning !
I never knew that losing could be so much fun !

(As Kunal has himself talked n talked about how he likes being bossed around...I don't want to repeat those things again )

Earlier, I wouldn't look for answers in her eyes
When I said, I want a divorce, I was avoiding her eyes
Why, because I couldn't bear to see hatred in her eyes ?
Or I didn't want her to see the like in my eyes
Then today, why did I keep looking towards her?
Did I want to see her reaction on touching me?
Was I trying to read something in her eyes, something which her words had failed to convey?
Was I looking for that glimmer of hope in her eyes?
Did I see it? that made me forget my worries or did I want to go in dreamworld to see it (Sorry this line is filmy I know )
Or was it the feeling of warmth which made me relax?
A feeling which was missing since mummy had started behaving like a stranger?

Goodnight !!!

Kunal Chopra's diary - 20th March 2012- Child in Me Was Laughing

Rockstar's diary - 20th March, 2012- I didn't know that life would make me laugh like this and more !

zindagi itni khubsoorat hogi, itni muskaan bikheregi,
khuli aankhon se kya, band aankhon se sapne mein bhi nahi socha tha
itni khushiya hongi ki, aankhon se khushi ke aansoon chalkenge
itni roshni hogi ki har roz diwali jaise roshan hoga
itne rang honge ki indradhanush bhi feeka lagne lagega
saare khwabon se jyada mukammal
saare sapno se jyada haseen
yeh meri aankhon ka dhoka hai ya zindagi ka ehsaan
khuli aankhon se khwab dekh raha hoon ya
aankhein munde khwabon ko sach hote dekh raha hoon
jo haseen sapne tumne dekhe the
woh shayad ab haqeeqat ka roop le chuke hai

I am sorry to cut to english, apologies !

The one song that comes to my mind repeatedly is ' mere haath mein tera haath ho, saari jannatein mere pass hai'
After the confession of love, even in an in-abberiated stage, comes the sense of dependency, wherever the roads of life take us, I want you to always be by my side.
the roads may be tough, the destination may be un-known
the means may be difficult
but together we can reach the destination.
whenever the ride gets tough, I will lead you,
however, I can only lead you, if you are by my side
we may not reach the destination we dream of,
but the journey will be better than our dreams only if you are by my side

Every time I thought this is it, life can't get any better, life surprised me always,
with you by my side, I keep smiling more n more n more day after day after day after day
Today was a fun filled day for Kunal, it started with Siddhi teasing Kunal for being born in the b/w era, to the water holi in the tub, the singing session of o mere dil ke chain, to the dance on soni soni, to the confession, the laughter on seeing 2 kunals, jalebi bai and the bike ride.
I dont know what made me laugh more, to see Kunal/Siddhi laughing together for the first time or seeing the family happy to see Kunal laughing. Perfect holi !!!

I would pause here lest it becomes very cliched/filmy, I hope you all enjoyed reading the post !!! 

Kunal Chopra's diary- 19 March 2012- Tum tokti ho na, acha lagta hai

Aaj yun laga jaise bahut si baatein hai jo tum janti nahi ho, ek Akdu Kunal hai, magar us mukhote ke piche,
ek aur Kunal bhi hai,
jo doosre logon ki tarah hi hansna, bolna chahta hai,
khelna chahta hai, nachna chahta hai,
chahta hai ki koi to ho jo uska apna ho,
uski khushi ko apni khushi samjhe, aur uske dard ko apna
jo use apna samjhe

Maloom hai, kai baatein hai, kya tumhe maloom hai
maloom hai, kyon karti ho, kyon ki main karne deta hoon
maloom hai kyon, acha lagta hai
tokti ho na, hmm..acha lagta hai
jab haq jamati ho na,  aur bhi acha lagta hai
maloom hai acha kyon lagta hai

maloom hai, aisi hi kai baatein hai jo tum nahi janti ho
maloom hai, tumhara chedna bhi pasand hai, buddha bolna, b/w tv bolna, bhule bisre geet
maloom hai, jab tum hansti ho, to aur bhi acha lagta hai
maloom hai, jab mere aage piche ghumti, to acha lagta hai
maloom hai, jab mujhse gussa hoti to aur bhi acha lagta hai
maloom hai, jab raat ko tum mera intezaar karti ho, to acha lagta hai
maloom hai, jab mujhse milne ke liye bahane banati ho, to acha lagta hai
maloom hai, jab mere liye sabse ladti ho, to aur bhi acha lagta hai
maloom hai, jab mujhe kisi baat se rokti ho, mera haath pakadti ho, to acha lagta hai
maloom hai, aisi kai baatein hai

maloom hai, jab aankhein khulti hai, to tumhe hi talashta hoon
jab bhi koi aahat hoti hai, to tumhara hi khayal ata hai
maloom hai, kabhi kabhi tumhari baatein yaad kar chehre par muskan khil jati ho
aur kabhi ankhon mein chamak
maloom hai, jab tum saath hoti ho to tumse door jane se dar lagta hai aur jab tum door hoti ho to kadam tumhari taraf bhad jate hai
maloom hai...

jab dard had se jyada bhad jata hai to aankhon se chalak jata hai aur jab
pyaar had se jyada bhad jata hai to zubaan par aa hi jata hai

Kya main aaj wakai hosh mein nahi tha, ya fir us behoshi ki aad mein apne man ki baat kehna asan ho gaya tha?
Kya apne man ki baat kehna jyada mushkil hota hai ya apne man mein kisi ka pyar chupna jyada mushkil
Kya pyaar ke badle pyaar pana jyada jaroori hota hai, ya apne pyar ka izhaar karna
Aaj tumhare sunne samjhne se jyada, shayad mera ikraar karna jyada jaroori tha.

ps: I so wanted to say, I told you so, I had written a few lines on 7th March, when Raj had said, Siddhi aage aage aur Kunal piche and Kunal had said, bhav khaa rahe hai..and he said the same thing
Sochne wali baat yeh hai ki , woh bhav kha rahee thi ya main bhaav de raha tha ?

Happy Holi- Siddhi

One Shot/Fiction- Siddhi's letter

Posting an OS/One Shot I had written when the divorce was a hot topic

 

The last six months have just zipped by.

Kunal won the case against Richa (he himself had faught the case and won it, obviously with Siddhi;s help). The time just zipped by with both of them engrossed in fighting the case and they didnt realise that the 6 months given by the court were almost about to end.
Tomorrow is the 10th of March, when the six months end. Tonight seemed to be a long night for Kunal and Siddhi, both were not able to sleep, neither of them had been able to profess their love to the other and had left their relation in the hands of destiny, destiny had got them together and if destiny willed they will be together.
It was early morning, the alarm rang and Kunal thought like other days, Siddhi would swicth it off, but even after five rings when the alarm didnt go off, he called fr Siddhi,
siddhi, alarm band karo na, siddhi.
he called out for here a couple of times, but he got no response..he looked for her around the room, but she was no where to be seen.
the alarm had stopped by then.
But Kunal got thinking, where is Siddhi. He knew that today was the day when the court would give the decision on their divorce case and they had to reach the court by noon.
He went through the morning motions, and was ready by 10, he called out to Seema,
Seema, Siddhi kahan hai?
Kunal bhaiya, subah hi uske bhaiya ka phone aaya tha aur Siddhi wahi chali gayee hai. Usne aapko nahi bataya?
Kunal ne kuch nahi kahan.
He left the house without taking breakfast, Seema mujhe kuch zaroori kaam hai, main nashta nahi kar paonga and he left.
He knew that to get the divorce, both husband and wife should be present in the court, else it is difficult to get the divorce(sorry folks i am making this up for my OS)
So he went to Kapil's house..
Seeing him, Shilpa had a surprise look and asked Jiju, aap akele? Siddhi kahan hai?
Siddhi- kunal was surprised too. So it looks like Siddhi isnt here also, then where has she gone?
He said, arre shilpa, main yaha se guzar raha tha, socha tum se mil loon
Just then Kapil also came home, and said, arre aap, aiye na.
Siddhi aaj subah subah aye thi kuch bol rahe thi, aaj koi zaroori case hai uska isliye aapka ashirwaad lena tha.
Aap jante hai kaun sa case hai?
Nahi, main nahi janta.
Aiye andar aiye na..nashta kijiye hamare saath
Kunal wasnt interested in the formalities, and said, Kapilji, mujhe kahi jana hai fir kabhi nashta kar lunga.
He was about to go when Kapil stopped him,
Siddhi yeh ek envelope aapke naam chod gayee thi- bol rahee thi ki main shaam ko aapko de doon.
Kunal ne envelope liya aur court ke taraf chal pada.
Woh yahi soch raha tha ki Siddhi aakir jaa kahan sakti hai, yahan par bhi nahi hai, to gai kahan.
Usne ghadi dekhi, to laga ki abhi waqt hai, anayas hi uske kadam mandir ki taraf badh chale, shayad apne divorce ke liye prarthna karna chahta tha.
Mandir ki sidhiyon par baithe baithe uski nazar siddhi ke envlope par gayee, usme divorce papers the aur ek khat bhi tha
Pehle to usne socha envelope band kar de, magar fir na jane kyon usne woh khat khola, dekha to siddhi ne likha tha.

Usne khol kar padhna shuru kiya.
aapko yaad hai, raveena ki mehndi ke din, kaise meri saari ka dhaga aapki shirt mein atak gaya tha.
Bus usi din se shayad maine aapke piche chalna sikh liya tha, jis disha mein aap le gaye, usi disha mein main chalti rahi, shayad uska alam yeh hai ki hum aaj divorce lene ke kagar par hai
jahan rishta na ho, waha dikhawa karna aasan hai
magar aap jisse pyar kare, woh aapke pass hote hue bhi door ho, aapke pass ho magar aap use choon na sake,
aapne sahi kahan, hume divorce hi le lena chahiye
haan maine kabhi anand se, aapke chote bhai se pyar kiya tha, magar shaadi to maine aap se kari thi.
Woh anand nahi tha jisne mujhe hamesha bachaya tha, aur na hi woh anand tha jo mere aanso nahi dekh sakta tha.
woh aap the jisne har mushkil mein mera saath diya, mera hi nahi, mere pariwar ka khayal rakha
jisne mujh par bharosa kiya
jo mere chehre par ayee pareshani ki lakiron ko padh liya karta hai
jiski baatein kabhi to mujhe rula deti aur kabhi hansa deti
jiske saath maine fir se jeena sikh liya
mana mujhe is ghar se joda anand ke pyar ne tha magar bandhe rakhe aapke saath ne
mana yeh rishta samjhote par rakha tha, magar nibhaya man se tha
mana aankhon mein kabhi anand ke sapne the, magar aankhon ne har jagah aapko hi talasha tha
mana man mein anand ki yaadein thi, magar nayee yaadon ne ab uski jagah le li hai
Mana, hamari shadi ke pehle maine anand se bahut pyar kiya tha, aur shayad yeh socha bhi nahi tha ki main kabhi kisi aur ko pyaar kar sakongi, anand se bhi jyada.
Anand ke saath maine zindagi bitane ka wada kiya tha, magar woh zindagi maine aapke saath gujari hai
uske saath kai sapne dekhe tha, magar un sapno ko aapke saath jiya hai
anand ke saath ki kalpana khwabon mein ki thi, magar woh kalpana aapke saath haqeeqat bani hai
anand ke saath kai khushi ke pal bitaye the, magar mere dukh mein aapka saath tha
anand ke bina to main jina sikh liya hai, magar apke bina ?
anand ko ek baar khokar fir pyaar karna to sikh liya, magar aapko kho kar shayad jina bhi bhul jaaon

aapke saath ek zindagi bitane ka khayal tha, magar aapne to kuch palon mein saath chod diya
aankho ne naye khwab dekhe the, magar aapne to achanak khwab se jaga diya
man ne naye ehsaas ko mehsoos kiya tha, magar apne ek dard de diya hai
sirf kehne se pyar nahi hota
saath dene mein hota hai
roothne mein, manane mein hota hai
intezaar karne mein
naarazgi mein
kisi aur ki khushi mein
kisi aur ka dard kam karne mein
yahi baat kai baar aapse kehne ki koshish kari
kabhi zubaan ne saath nahi diya, to kabhi dil ne
kabhi waqt sahi na tha to kabhi mauka
kabhi shayad aap sunna nahi chahte the
aur kabhi shayad main keh nahi payee
kabhi shayad aap manne ko tayar nahi the
aur kabhi dil mein yeh dar ki aapne agar ise sach nahi mana
aur kabhi yeh dar ki shayad aapne mujhe apnaya nahi to
kabhi man ne chaha ki meri is unkahi baat ko aap bina kahe samjhe le
mere is jazbaat ko aap bhi mehsoos kar sake
magar shayad ab in baaton ka koi fayda nahi--end of letter
(guys, i dont mean for them to divorce, the main objective here was Siddhi's confession, anycase I cant write sad ones )

Siddhi's Musings

(adding an old page from Siddhi's diary for a change)
This is Siddhi's  answer to all questions around her silence
A lot of people have been after Siddhi, why is she quite etc etc (and named her names)..these are my views-
Siddhi, kal jo hua woh galat hua, saari galati meri hai.

Aapne kitni aasani se keh diya ki saari galati meri hai, jo hua woh galat hua
Magar aapke is ek wakya ne mere saare sapne tod diye, woh sapne jo maine bus abhi dekhe bhar the, jo abhi tak saakar bhi nahi hue the.
Abhi kal hi aapne kahan tha ki aap ko meri kami mehsoos hogi
aur aap ki zindagi mere bina adhoori hai
Aur aaj aap nazarein jhuka kar keh rahe hai ki mujhse alag ho jao
Agar mera dil todna hi tha to mujhse nazre milakar yahi baat kehte, main dekhna chahti thi us waqt aapki aankhon mein khushi thi ya dard
Kitni aasani se aapne keh diya ki alag ho jao
aapka yahi wakya mere man mein haazar baar ghoom raha tha
Magar kya kehne bhar se rishta toot jata hai
Sirf ek talak le lene se hamara rishta khatam?
Shayad aapke liye hoga, kyonki aapne to ise sirf ek samjhota samjha tha
Magar mere liye yeh ek samjhota nahi tha
Badi mushkil se mere dil ne fir se kisi ke liye dhadakna shuru kiya tha
aur aapne aaj fir isse tod diya
Aap to jaante hai na apne pyaar ko khone ka dard?
Anand ke jane ke baad to main jaise sirf naam ke liye jee rahe thi
Kabhi socha nahi tha ki yeh dil fir kisi ke liye dhadak payega
fir in aankhon mein kuch khwab honge
kisi pati patni ko muskurate dekhti to sochti, shayad yeh khushiyan ab mere naseeb mein nahi hai
kabhi khud ko kosti to kabhi bhagwan ko apni is badnaseebi ke liye
bhagwan par se to jaise vishwas hi uth gaya tha
beman se aapse shaadi ki
magar fir dheere dheere na jane kab in aankhon mein fir kuch naye sapne ubharne lage the
agar mera saath yu hi chod dena tha
to kyon mere aanson poche, inhe behne dete
kyon mujhe girne se bachaya
kyon meri takleefon mein mera saath diya
kyon mujhe fir se muskurane ki wajah di
Aapne yeh to dekha ki anand mera pyaar tha,
magar yeh nahi dekha ki har jagah meri aankhein sirf aapko hi talashti thi
aapki muskurahat meri aankhon mein jhalakti thi
aur aapka dard meri aankhon mein
main anand ko aapke andar nahi talash rahi thi
main apne us sapnon ke raajkumar ko aap mein talash rahi thi
aap mere har sapne se alag the, magar fir bhi aap mujhe ache lagne lage the

kaash aap meri aankhon ko pad pate, mere aanso dekh pate. Jab aap meri khaamoshi ya mera dard hi nahi samjh paye to in bematlab ke shabdon ka kya mol.
Jo insaan yeh nahi samjh sakta ki meri khushi uske saath mein hai
aur usse duri mere dard ki wajah
usse main shabdon mein apne man ki baat kaise kehti
jab aapne yeh maan hi liya hai main anand se pyar karti hoon, to fir aur kuch kehne ke liye baki hi kya hai
main chahti thi ki aap meri unkahi baaton ko samjhe

 

(i have put a brake on my thoughts for now..thanks for reading my blabbering, I know still people would say why she is quite etc..but I think for me they both have to find the way out)

Kunal Chopra's random musings 17 March 2012

A lot of people have been asking when did Kunal start loving Siddhi, why did he start, how etc.

 

I have to admit that I haven't seen the episode from the day1 so I don't know all the reasons why he hated Siddhi in the beginning.

 

But I think I have seen most of the key bits after their wedding..

 

And here is my take on the reasons,

 

As I mentioned before, I think the why is not so important, and no one can really ever say why they like someone. There can simply be no reason to like someone, you just like someone or you dont like. There can be some few things or characteristics which one may like in some one.

So say, I like how he/she smiles, how positive that person is, how helpful that person is, how caring that person is, how independent and what good attitude that person has.

But is he/she the only person who has those qualities? There will be a lot of other people who may have those qualities but will I like them ? I don't think so. It is a unique combination of lot of things which makes one like someone..And then also finally, the whole is more than the sum of its parts..so why he likes Siddhi, is something really tough to say completely. Yes there can be some main things..

 

Then people are saying, that they didnt show him falling in but they showed Siddhi..I would like to point out a few events which showed it..(just it was nt made obvious like Siddhi, where she was smiling like crazy or being jealous or doing the running around etc) -they did show how and when he has been showen taking care of her- not sure why he did that.

 

1. From day 1, he told her not to work with T company - Why? Because they would take his revenge on her.

2. There have been two occassions when he has shouted at her (yes ok, he shouted at her a lot more after the divorce thing..most of the times for no fault of her's and in the beg of marriage for every small thing he shouted at her)..but if we talk about incidents before divorce, he shouted at her once when he came to know she gave him a recommendation for job and when something happened around sankrant and he shouted at her and asked her not to talk to him. Other than that, always if she cried he was there to console her.

Infact not only does he offer the tissue, but he makes it a point to help cheer her up

during her bday, he talks all that abt she asking for a car world tour for gift

at home, when he tells he has come to the room for first time after marriage, he again realises she was upset and talks abt the photo to cheer her up

even after the first court case, he tells, acha hua tum aise court mein nahi royee, warna judge

and during that whole case, he tells her couple of times to leave T's job

3. Even if he loves her because of the good things she has done for him and his family, is that not a good enough reason..I don't think there are too many ppl other than your best friends who will care so much for you

4. When Siddhi was paying for Ms Raveena, Kunal was helping Ms Shilpa

5. During the whole wedding thing, he didn't tell her a word when she imitates him in front of all the relatives, puts haldi on his face. He didnt shout at her even once.

6. He likes her just because she is his wife. I think somewhere the custom.rituals bind the people whether they admit it, whether they like it or not. He has always showed or used his right on her (in a good way, but he has always fulfilled his responsibiliites towards her)

7. During that famous diwali scene..inspite of their initial argument, he does try to help her..it was more like or a case where ppl fight with their siblings / spouse at home, but outside they are still one.

8. During the whole Raveena's wedding, he also shared a lot of painful things with her..they never showed Kunal's emotional side being revealed to the other family, but with Siddhi--when he misses anand.his mom and says that the ppl who had so much craze abt Raveena's wedding are not there..and when he was emotional after her bidaai..He also shared her doubts abt hiding things from Vikram with her. So she was someone he could confide in

9. All the times when Siddhi had helped him, he had also helped her.

 

I havent listed each and every small thing..but I think during the last one year as CV's have said,, that they have been married for a year, just like Siddhi had reasons to like him, so did he.. Just that it wasn't made obvious with the dialogues..

 

Just my pov !!

Kunal Chopra's diary 16 March 2012- Colours in my life

Khamoshi

Kabhi tumne meri khamoshi ko sunne ki koshish kari hai
agar hum samjhna chahe to humari khamoshi bhi humse bahut kuch kehti hai
kabhi hamari khamosh aankhon mein laachari hoti hai
kabhi ane wale kal ke naye sapne
kabhi beete dino ki yaadein
kabhi kisi apne ko talashti hai aur kabhi bheed mein kho jana chahti hai
aaj meri yeh khamosh aankhein bhi tumhe kuch kehti nazar aayengi
shayad woh tumhe apne paas bula rahee hai
jo baat lafson mein nahi keh saka woh meri aankhein keh rahe hai
mere khamosh se lab, unmein tumhe ek muskurahat nazar ayegi
jane anjne kadam khud ba khud tumhare taraf badh jate hai
aaj kuch na keh kar bhi maine tumhe sab kuch keh diya hai

Colours in my life
meri zindagi mein aane ka shukriya, ise rangeen banane ka shukriya
ab jo bhi rang zindagi bhikeragi woh khushiya hi layega
ab in ankhon mein khushiya jyada nazar aati hai
chehre par muskurahat rehti hai
in rangon ko mein meri zindagi mein lane ka shukriya

Kunal Chopra's diary 15th March 2012- kuch baat samjhne ki nahi hoti hai

Rockstar's diary update 15th March, 2012- If only it were so easy to understand the human emotions

 

Kabhi kabhar apna gussa mujhe khud samajh nahi aata

aur mera pyaar doosro ko samajh nahi aata hai

 

I think I have slowly come to learn that anger is not a good emotion to have, it can turn a victory into a defeat. With that the realisation has come that I myself don't or am unable to understand what I am going through, why I behave the way I do.

 

Aur mera pyaar doosro ko samajh nahi aata-

kya main yeh siddhi se keh raha tha ? Shayad haa, isliye meri nazarein jhuki hui thi.

kya main chahta hoon ki log mujhe samajh sake, ya main chahta hoon khud ko badlna, doosro ke liye

kya main yeh kehna chahta hoon, ki jaise bhi jataya jaye, pyaar to pa..hi hai

 

Insaano ko samjhna agar aasan hota to zindagi bhi shayad asan hoti

jab insaan khud ki bhavnao ko hi nahi samajh sakta hai to fir

doosro ko kaise samjhega

shayad unhe samjhne ki nahi sirf mehsoos karne ki jaroorat hai

kabhi kabhi sahi galat se jyada, khud ka man kya kehta hai woh sunna jyada jaroori hai

 

I know its a small diary today, but the mood is upbeat, and I dont want to add mumbo jumbo hifi words..so am calling it a day today..

 

There is some additional couplet- I know it will come haunting me tomorrow, because this suits tomorrow's episode but this is Kunal and my state of mind

 

Ek woh samay tha jab hum sare darwaze khol, khushiyon ka intezaar karte the

aur aaj, khushiyan band darwaze par bhi dastak de rahee hai

ek woh samay tha, jab chaaron joker ke bawjood hum haar jate the

aur aaj, zindagi joker ban hume jeeta rahe hai

ek woh samay tha, jab khushiya hume ansoon de jaya karti thi

aur aaj, zindagi mein gum bhi aate hai to khushiyon ki tarah

ek woh samay tha, jab chand ki chandni bhi aankhon ko jala diya karti thi

aur aaj, suraj humse nazarein churata hai

ek woh samay tha, jab zindagi berang ho chuki thi

aur aaj zindagi khud hame rangne aayee hai

 

jab dono hi ek doosre ke rang mein rang gaye hai, to pehle kaun kabool karta hai isse farak nahi padna chahiye shayad

Kunal Chopra's diary 14 March 2012- Laugh with the world and world laughs with you

Rockstar's diary update 14th March, 2012- main zindagi ka saath nibhata chala gaya- barbadiyon ka jashna manata chala gaya

 

kehte hai, ki ishq aur mushq chupaye nahi chipta

fir kyon mujhe tumhara woh pyaar nazar nahi aata

haan tumhe mera khayal hai

haan tumne hamesha ek dost ki tarah meri madad kari hai

haan tum mere liye sab se ladne ke liye tayar ho

fir kyon tum mere rukhe swabhav ke piche chipe mere pyar ko nahi samajh payee

kyon jab maine talaak ke liye kahan, meri baat maan li

kyon tum yeh nahi samajh payee ki aaj bhi meri zindagi mein ek humsafar ki kami hai

kyon tum yeh nahi dekh paaye ki jab tumhari aankhon se aansu behte hai, takleef mujhe bhi hoti hai

aur jab tum muskurati ho, to sukun mujhe bhi milta hai

kyon tum kuch kehte kehte ruk jati ho

kyon tumhare kadam meri taraf uthte to hai, magar fir khud ba khud ruk jate hai

kaun sa fansla hai jo tum tay nahi kar paa rahee ho

kyon chah kar bhi mujhe tumhari aankhon mein woh apna pan nazar nahi aata

 

Who am I, I am an akdu person

 

It was a difficult day in court today, because I was almost proclaimed guilty for a crime that I had never committed. Why did I not tell the truth in the court, that I didn't say ilikeyou Richa, I could have questioned the witness that did you hear me say Richa.

Why did Richa bring in that witness, was she sure that I wouldnt tell the truth in the court, that I wouldnt admit my true feelings in the court in front of everyone?

Later, the entire family was at home, rueing the bad day in the court and mourning my sad fate.

Why was I left alone in all this to while away my sorrow with a drink?

Why was Seema, my dear SIL/sister not there with me to console me, probably because she is my well wisher, but she is still not my confidante.

Why was my father, the one who is proud of me, not with me to console me, probably because he tries to understand me, but doesn't always succeed, there is a distance between us which only Anand or my mother could bridge

Why was my wife, the one who likes me, around but still not there to console me

Do I miss a close confidante,

someone with whom I can be me,

someone who doesn't judge me,

someone who isn't looking for a tit for tat with me?

someone who doesn't count when I didn't follow the niceties of saying a thank you/sorry but someone who counts all the times I was there when they were sad

Someone who doesn't count all the times I didn't follow the niceties of a valentines day but

someone who counts all the times I made them smile

someone who counts all the times I was there when they needed someone

 

How is it ?

 

I know in this post I have gone against Siddhi..but I think her tit/tat attitude is not correct. And again no intention to debate.., I am just writing a diary !!!

Kunal's Diary 13 March 2012- A chef's diary

Chef's diary update 13th March, 2012- main tere pyaar mein cook bhi ban gaya

 

Jyada khush hone ki jaroorat nahi hai, chai papa ke liye banai thi.

 

Kabhi kabhi kisi se apne man ki baat kehna mushkil kyon ho jata hai

Kabhi kabhi dil har cheez ke bahane kyon dhoondta hai, kyon kisi se baat karne ke bahane talashta hai,

kyon hum chahte hai ki koi aur hamari khamoshi ko sun le, hamari aakhon ko samajh le

jab hum khud hi apne man ki baat ko ansuna kar dete hai

Kya kisi se apne man ki baat kehna hi kafi nahi hai

kyon haan ke badle haan ki umeed rakhta hai dil

Kya hua agar usne inkaar kar diya, Kya mujhe is baat ka sukun na hoga

Ki maine apne dil ki suni ?

 

shayad mujhe intezaar hai us pal ka jab

aur khamosh rehna mushkil ho jayega

jab dil ki baaton ko aur ansuna karna asan na hoga

jab apne is pyaar ko man mein chupa kar rakhna asan na hoga

 

I am really sorry I dont know if what I wrote made any sense !!!

 

The day though ended on a lacklustre note, Kunal didnt praise Siddhi, I was hoping against hope that he will finally say something casually..but he didnt

Kunal's Diary 12th March 2012- sun sako to sun lo, main bolta nahi

Rockstar's (a shayar's diary -12th March-Ajeeb Kashmakash hai, choo le mujhko meri parchayee, sun sako to sun lo, ki mai bolta nahi)  

 

I am thinking, reel life Kunal is taking away my job...how can I write a diary if he also writes one.

 

Still here are my two cents, but my POV...

 

Tu paas hai mere

phir bhi saath nahin hai mere

mein saath hoon mere

phir bhi paas nahin hoon tere

majboor tamanna

bebas aankhen

ajeeb kashmakash hai

sard ehsaason mein thitharti tanhai

choo le mujhko aye meri parchayee

sun sako to sunlo ke main bolta nahin hoon

ki khamosh labz meri ankhon mein ghoomte nahee

 

Finally I think we see Kunal progressing from his confusion/surprise thinking, did I really say i ...you Siddhi..how and when did it happen, to the shayar Kunal.. and not a depressing shayar but a shayar writing shayari in kabhi kabhi style. So this marks his progress from someone doubting it to someone writing shayari just like Siddhi was writing on valentine's day.

 

I think over the period of last one month he has become confident of his feelings, initially his outburst came unconscioulsy in the drunken state, then he was confused did I really say that.

Then he was still not accepting it, he just kept wallowing in guilt of being with his brother's fiance, his pain during the valentine's day when he said anand why did you leave him, she still searches for you in me, helping her during the court case. But today I think his poetry conveyed that he is in a kashmakash, should I tell you or should I not tell you?

 

What does it take for someone to confess or tell the other person what one really thinks/feels ? Courage or Helplessness?

Courage to express yourself, irrespective of the outcome, irrespective of what the other person will think about you, how the other person will react?

Or helplessness, because you have no choice but to express yourself, because you can't keep waiting for the other person and it is a now or never situation for you?

Is it the ego which stops the person?

 

Is kunal really feeling guilty or is he afraid of rejection? If everything is fair in love and war, then what will it take for Kunal to confess? If he already likes her and wants her to read his silence, then is he still feeling guilty?

 

I just remembered few lines that Kunal had himself told Gaurav when Raveena had fled from her house. He said, that ' jab hum kisise rishta jodta hai, to kisi aur se puchne se pehle, hume apne dil se puchna chahiye'. I wonder if Kunal applies that same statement to himself as well.

He still thinks that she still likes anand, if only instead of asking others or looking for her affirmation, he would have asked himself, then he would have probably got the answers.

 

For both of them I can say, that when the sun rises, it doesn't have to announce itself, it is there for all to see, it is not the fault of sun if you turn your back towards it and assume that it is still night. And neither does it become night just because you turn your back towards it.

 

PS- There is one strikingly good thing about Kunal. He has been shown to have respect for the women, I saw it once in a past episode as well..he didn't lift his eyes/face to see her in the eye and today also, that was one good thing in i am sorry, the comic show today, he was equally embarassed today.

And now that I have a PS, want to add one more thing, in the court when Richa was being questioned about her past, if it were Siddhi in Richa's place and someone was asking her such personal questions, Kunal would have objected for sure !!!

 

I know I couldn't write the proverbial Kunal diary, but his poem left no room for me interpret !

Thank you again for reading!!!

Kunal's diary 9 Mar 2012- Bahut Achi hai

Rockstar's diary -9th March-I want to thank you not to make you happy but because it gives me happiness.

 

The battle has almost been won inspite of the initial hiccups..

 

Bahut achi hai na ?

Haan, bahut achi hai..

 

Sometimes the things or the emotions that we are not able to acknowledge slip out at the least expected times unknowingly. It is only for so long that one can hide them..be it anger or like.  

 

Once we have fallen into an image, much later, the image that we created, continues to bind us such that it is difficult to break it. A talkative person is always supposed to be talkative, a short tempered person has to be always be short tempered, a shy person should always be shy and an akdu an akdu.

 

Slowly and silently she made in roads into my life

One by one broke all the barriers I had put up

Broke the walls of self defence I had built over the years

She stood by me

And now all there is in my life is HER

Am I glad to have her as my wife

Do I need to thank her ?

Will the words do justice to what I want to say?

Will she understand what I want to say?

I decide to thank her

Not because it will make her happy

But because it will make ME happy

Make me happy to tell her how glad I am to have her by my side

Make me happy to tell her how glad I am at her success

Make me happy to tell her how proud I am of her

The words may me fail, but I did try

And, Am I jealous of HER..Do you think I can ever?

Didnt you see the gleam of pride in my eyes at her success

 

 

I sign off with my signature dialogue..and now its on tv too and everyone knows about it..ek to biwi upar se vakil...(He has stopped saying aurat and vakil...)

 

Siddhi..sorry sorry, Siddhi too has to say a few words today

 

The best praise a student can get is from the teacher

The happy moment for a student is when the teacher congratulates the student

For it is the teacher who is the student's mentor

It is the teacher who is the student's icon

It is the teacher who is the student's hero

So, if I want to hear him praise me, it is because,

The teacher knows my strengths and weakness,

If the teacher praises me, I know that I have truly conquered

 

(Kunal hasn't taught her all the ropes yet, but he did help her when her chips were out..so  the one who has seen her down and out and weak...if he praises her..she would know that she really has been successfull)

 

I dont think that Kunal would ever be jealous of Siddhi, he isn't an insecure person, he never was. So he can only have Abhiman on Siddhi.

 

Thank you again for reading!!!

If Tomorrow Comes- 8th March 2012

Rockstar's diary -8th March-If Tomorrow Comes

Score of the case, since Siddhi donned the black coat

Day 1

Kunal  zero

Siddhi minus

Thakral and Sons 1

Day 2

Kunal 100

Siddhi 200

Thakral and Sons -200

The score sums up the proceedings of the 2nd day in court (if I am not wrong, it is the 2nd day only and not the 3rd ...wrong/right ??)

Jis Thakral ke saamne khade hokar log case ladne se tak inkar kar dete hai, aaj use hi Siddhi ne gawah ke katgarah mein laa khada kar diya tha. Kabhi kabhi sochta hoon, ki kya wakai yeh kamjor hai, kya wakai ise mere sahare ki jaroorat hai? Kahi woh jaan bhuj kar galtiyan to nahi karti jisse main HERO ban saku  (O well, this is me just pulling a fast one on Kunal )

Aaj Siddhi ne Richa se hamare beete kal ke baare mein kai sawal kiye

tum Kunal se kab mili

tum kunal se kabse pyar karti thi

kunal ko likhe love letters

kunal se break up

kunal ke liye apni mangni todna

kunal ki shaadi

Kunal Richa, Richa Kunal- yahi naam adalat mein gunj rahe the, ek naam jisse main hamesha khud ko jodna chahta tha, magar aaj yahi naam jaise koi mayne hi nahi rakhta tha.

Aaj tak jab bhi un beete lamho ko yaad karta tha to man udaas ho jata

kabhi un haseen palon ko yaad kar ankhen chamak uthi aur kabhi

woh beetein panch saal yaad kar aankhen bhar jati

kabhi un beeton palon ko bhulne ki koshish karta to kabhi

un beeton palon ke dobara laut aane ki umeed karta

kabhi woh saath guzare waqt ko fir se jeene ki koshish karta to kabhi

woh ekaki beetaye samay ko bhul jane ki koshish karta

kabhi richa ko kosta mera dil todne ke liye aur kabhi

kudh ko kosta richa ko yaad karne ke liye

magar aaj, aaj jaise woh beete pal, woh lamhe, Richa, shayad koi mayne nahi rakte the

Woh mera ek guzra hua kal hai, jisse main apne aane wal kal se door rakhna chahta hoon

Woh mere zindagi ka kadwa sach hai, jise maine kabul kar liya hai

Ek atit ka aisa pal jiska waqt khatam ho chuka hai

Shayad un chey saalon ne mujhe apne aaj ki ehmiyat ka ehsaas kara diya hai

Main kya tha aur ab kya maine paa liya hai iska parichay shayad ho gaya hai mujhe..

This is the end of Richa for me

PS-I am not sure whether Kunal really felt the same..probably these are my thoughts

Goodbye Angry Young Man- 7 March 2012

(RockStar's) diary 7 March 2012 (jahan bhi main jaati hoon, wahi chale aate ho, chori chori mere dil mein samaate ho- old hindi song)

Papa , dekho to kitna bhav kha rahee hai..

Just wondering, isn't it a common human trait, the more you run after someone the more they enjoy making you run, and it is difficult to say who is enjoying it more, the one is who is being chased or the one who is running. And if the chase is not successful, both are sad, so one needs to rightfully know when to apply the brakes.

Sochne wali baat yeh hai ki , woh bhav kha rahee thi ya main bhaav de raha tha ?

Slowly the layers are coming off one at a time, first there was the non stop smile, then the jhooth mooth ka ruthna, attitude and now he doesn't mind doing the running around, and is ready to bear her tantrums, listen to her sarcasm and all this silently.
Is it a role reversal of sort as Raj pointed out, Siddhi aage aage, Kunal piche piche. Is this what we can see in the coming episodes?

My cousin had once told me that once married, you are always at war with each other. Since yesterday night Kunal and Siddhi were at a war unto themselves. The question was who gives up first and today it was Kunal who laid down his weapons- acha baba meri galti hai, I am sorry( Very rightly so, until now it was Siddhi who was doing the dancing, so better Kunal return the favour). Is he slowly changing from the akdu person to the soft natured person who is always smiling.

Are we going to miss the angry young man and now all we will see is the SRK style man :)

Tum Ruthi Raho Main Manata Rahoon- 6 March 2012

Kunal's (RockStar's) diary 6 March 2012 (tum ruthi raho, main manata rahoon..to maza jeene ka aur bhi aata hai- old hindi song words)

I think this update will be in two parts only

Kunal

Have you ever wondered what is the reason,
the more you tease me the more I smile
the more you imitate me the more I smile
the more you get angry, the more I smile
the more you try to pacify me, the more I smile
the more you shout at me, the more I smile
the more you follow me, the more I smile
the more you plead to me, the more I smile
the more you mock at me, the more I smile
have I forgotten how to be angry or have I just remembered how to L?

Did I ever tell you that I like it
how your eyes keep following me when I am around
how you keep meeting all my unreasonable demands (tea, coffee, water)
how you keep asking me all stupid questions
how you keep trying to seek my attention
how you seem lost when trying to talk to me
how you keep looking for excuses to talk to me
and no I don't want you to stop your non stop chatter even though I complain that irritates me !!
Did I ever tell you, how I love all the attention you give me !!!

I will answer one of the questions in parts now..rest probably later

Why do I like Siddhi- let me think
for starters, she is different from the other people, how..well
she has ..ok golden hair, 4 hands, 4 legs, she sleeps in the day and works in the night?
Well..no she is more or less just like the other people, I think now I know why I like her
because
I like to talk to her about anything and everything
I like it when she teases me
I like it how she looks around for me in the crowd
I like it how her face lights up when she see spots me in the crowd
I like it how she smiles openly and gayily
I like to just be with her
I like it because with her I am myself
I like how she doesn't laugh at my childish dreams
I like how she always inspires me
I like how she just listens when I want to talk
I like how she talks when all I want to do is listen to her
I don't know why I like her but I know what I like about her

(There is no intention to be sarcastic..if it appears, so I will remove these lines)

Siddhi

Mujhe lagta hai, main kisi musibat mein padti isliye hoon  ki mujhe pata hota hai ki aap mera saath dene zaroor aayenge.

I am a girl of the 21st century,
strong willed, financially independent
someone who can face the world herself and solve the problems
but
I still want someone I can look up to
someone who is around the corner to help me
someone who will stand for me, stand by me
someone who can tell me that things will be alright soon
someone whom I can lean on to
someone who can be my HERO
(who says I am independent )

Hum Saath Saath Hain- Mr Thakral and Sons

Kunal's (RockStar's) diary 3rd March 2012 (We are together- Mr Thakral and Sons)

I think this update will be in three parts

Kunal

Do I need to write anything in my diary, the smile at the end of the day said it all.

Aaj sab jan gaye honge ki Siddhi akeli nahi hai, woh Kunal Chopra ki patni hai, hum talak le, chahe ek doosre se roothe ya naaraz ho, magar Siddhi meri patni hai aur hamesha rahegi.
Thakral ya koi bhi use na hara sakta hai na use akela samajh kar uski insult kar sakta hai.

Aaj main Richa ko bhi yeh bata dena chahta tha, ki ab bahut ho gaya, ab Kunal aur Siddhi ek saat hai, woh chahe jitni galatfehmi khadi kar de, hamara rishta to jud chuka hai. Ab se woh jahan jayegi hum dono ko saath hi payegi. She is Mine in clear and simple terms and you dare not mess with her.

Saath hi main Siddhi ko bhi yeh batana chahta tha, ki woh akeli nahi hai, main hamesha uske saath hoon. Yeh mera style nahi hai..magar kabhi kabhi karna padta hai

Ek rishte mein bahut kuch mayne rakhta hai
kabhi ek doosre ko chedna
kabhi ek doosre se roothna
kabhi ek doosre ko manana
aur kabhi ek doosre par haq jantana
jahan haq hota hai wahi shikayatein bhi hoti hai
aur jahan shikayat hoti hai wahi ek rishta

(I hope I haven't copied what Seema had told Siddhi once..but all these elements were shown in the few minutes of waiting for the auto and him asking her to thank her )

His Smile

You don't have to tell me anything, I can read it in your eyes
You don't have to say anything, I can see it in your smile
You don't have to do anything, I can see it in your walk
You don't have to say word, because I can read your silence

(I wish I knew how to get pictures of the episode or paste them here..his smile in the end said it all..there was hope, there was happiness, satisfaction, acknowledgement and peace.)

us hansi mein ek khushi thi, ek apnapan, ek nayee umeed, ek shanti ka ehsaas aur aane wale kal se ladne ka josh
)


Siddhi

If this is not love, I don't want to fall in love
If this is hell, I don't want to go to heaven
If this is what nightmares are made of, I don't want my dreams to come true
If this is what life is with you, I want an action REPLAY (So much for my creativity folks sorry )

Wherever you lead me, I will follow you
My eyes will just follow you, where ever you lead me to
My eyes are only on you, so do guide me when I falter
My eyes are only on you, so do hold me when I fall
My eyes will follow you, which ever road you lead me to
I know, we will reach our destination if you lead me
I know, the journey will be pleasant if you lead me
I know, I know

Pooja - From the first scene till the last, there were two words that came to my mind on seeing Kunal- Rockstar and Dabbang. As far as possible, I am not going to point out bloopers or criticize anything in my posts..so just loved him in the entire episode.